Tuesday, October 31, 2006

BOB BARKER TO RETIRE

Bob Barker, 83 in December, is set to retire from THE PRICE IS RIGHT in June 2007. So hurry up and camp outside to get on the show! TRex.. Meghan... I'm looking in your direction.....
"The price is wrong, bitch!"

BORG SPHERES & SCORPIONS

Oops, forgot to post some Vegas pics from a few weeks back. Unfortunately, I only have 4 handy while I'm remembering, so here they are. Bottom 2 are of a tasty table of delicious BORG SPHERES at the Star Trek bar at the Hilton. If you're over 21, I highly recommend getting yourself your own personal mini-Borg Sphere next time you find yourself in Vegas; it will fuck you up in a delightfully good way. There's nothing quite like stumbling around the ST Bar, plastered on smoldering green alien drinks as Klingons and Ferengi pass by you. This last time, Dylan and I were so inebriated, we ended up buying Classic ST Phasers at the gift shop. I scare myself sometimes. The Top 2 are at an undisclosed bar.... poison of choice there are the ever tasty, large-sized SCORPIONS. Mmmmm!!!!!

CLASSIC MARVEL FIGURINES

Looks like Jimmy needs a 2nd job cause check out this entirely new line of Marvel collectibles!!
The Classic Marvel Figurine series is 2-in-1; kickass figurine based off existing designs (usually statues) and a magazine which spotlights the character!! Each figure is approx 3.75inches tall and costs $12. They've already made several and I pretty much want them all, with a select few the exception. Now all I need to do is find a Comic Store that will order these with possibly a discounted price (*coughlisa?cough*). heh. Hmmm, and I also need to figure out a place to put them all!
FREAKIN' SUH-WEEEET!!!!!!
*Click on image to enlarge and geek out on some of the figurines*

CHATTERER II

A few days ago I mentioned how the Chatterer Cenobite in Hellraiser II looked different in the end scenes and how I didn't like the change nor did I understand why. Well, I did some research and apparently there's a deleted scene (NOT available on the dvd - booo!!!) where the Chatterer goes "through the process of his face undergoing disgusting changes...." So there you have it. I'm glad they dropped the "beauty parlor" scene (as one site described it), but its a shame the visual outcome still stays on the screen during the final scene.

Another deleted scene from Hellraiser II is the "Cenobite Surgeon" scene where Pinhead and The Female don surgeon's clothes and masks and unleash bloody havoc upon the hospital. Yeah, a bit too silly for the movie, I think.

MORE MARVEL ZOMBIES

More Marvel Zombies are on the way!
Yay!!! We're going to have TWO new Marvel Zombies projects in 2007:

1) A Marvel Zombies Prequel one-shot,
by Kirkman & Phillips
2) Marvel Zombies Vs. Army of Darkness!
Yep, you read that correctly!
Previous recommended reading:
* Ultimate Fantastic Four Vol 6 : Frightful
(1st appearence of the Marvel Zombies)

* Marvel Zombies
* and Kirkman's awesome The Walking Dead,
multi-volume (absolute great Zombie stuff!)

NOSTROMO PINS

Cool Nostromo Lapel Pins are now available!

You can buy them for me here on ebay! Hurry, before someone else buys em for me! (although I can handle duplicates, so don't worry too much)

CANDYCORN TROOPER

And did you get your
Candy Corn
Clonetrooper?
*(yes, that is for real)

TRICK-OR-TREAT ! !

Monday, October 30, 2006

ALIENS: EXTERMINATION

Aww, man!!
Hey, someone buy me this arcade game on ebay:
ALIENS: EXTERMINATION!
I'll be your best friend!!!!! ---------------------------------------------------------------------
*Damn you, Jason! For showing me this auction!

SMALLVILLE MONTAGE

Real slow day today on JimSmash... sorry, there's just not much happening today in the World of Dork! I thought I'd post a kickass montage of Smallville clips, but man, there's not much on YouTube! You'd think there'd be more. Anyway, here's the best I could find.... some cool clips, but its missing lots of rad moments. If you watch Smallville, you know what I'm talking about.

"Somebody saaaaaaaave meeeeeeee!!!"
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* Smallville - there's about 5-10minutes of COOL in each episode. You just have to power through the other 45minutes of WB crap-drama stylings.

Friday, October 27, 2006

HALLOWEEN WEEKEND

Tomorrow is our big Company Halloween Party!

So I'm off to finish up my last-minute costume!

Anyone else celebrating Halloween this weekend?!

Whatchadoin' and whatchagoin' as?

TIE FIGHTER WHEELCHAIR

Dig this dude's tripped out TIE Fighter wheelchair!Impressive! MOST Impressive!!

WTF? - PS3 SCARY BABY

WHAT THE FUCK?!!!
Sony's new ad campaign for the new PS3 involves a Scary Weeping Baby.
Man, just click here and you'll see. Make sure to play the commerical.
quicktime

MARVEL STAMPS

This summer, DC Comics released their characters on USPS stamps! Well now its MARVEL's turn! Here is what they will look like. I dig the use of Kirby and Buscema art. But I'm a bit perplexed on some of the character choices. Of all the vast characters in the Marvel Universe to pull from, they include SPIDERWOMAN and ELEKTRA? WTF?

EVIL DEAD - THE MUSICAL !

I'm not quite sure what to think of this,
but there is now an Off-Broadway musical of the EVIL DEAD.
"This is a Boomstick, sha-la-la-la-la...!"

Website.

SCI-FI JACK-O-LANTERNS

How to make a CYLON and DALEK Jack-O-Lantern!and the now-classic ALIEN Jack-O-Lantern!More pumpkin carvings here.

HELLRAISERS ON AMC

This week is proving to be HELLRAISER week, what with the remake post and repost of the Cenobite Villain of the Day... now, AMC was running both HELLRAISER and HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II last night!! Sure, they were edited for TV, which means they lose some of their flare, but still it was great they aired them! I watched both. HELLRAISER II is so freaking cool! They're remaking the first one, which is unnecessary - Hellraiser II is essentially a remake and its perfect. My only complaint is that they changed the facial design of the Chatterer Cenobite! The first movie version was absolutely spectacular, but then replaced with a crappy knock off in the 2nd. Still can't figure out why they did that.

POLE DANCING GAME

Followup to the Peekaboo Pole Dancing
Click here to play!
(think Dance Pad Revolution but with arrow keys)

Cue KISS music:
Dont need to wait for an invitation
You gotta live like youre on vacation
Theres something sweet you cant buy with money -
lick it up!, lick it up!
Its all you need, so believe me honey
It aint a crime to be good to yourelf

Lick it up! lick it up! its only right now
Lick it up! lick it up! ooh yeah
Lick it up! lick it up! come on, come on
Lick it up! lick it up!!
Ooh yeah (ooh yeah) ooh yeah (ooh yeah), yeah yeah
Lick it up! lick it up!!
*and repeat chorus for 4 more minutes.....

Thursday, October 26, 2006

PEEKABOO POLE DANCING

Get your Xmas shopping in now for the kiddies! What better toy could you find to teach and instill confidence and self esteem into your daughter than Tesco's "Peekaboo Pole Dancing!!"? Found in the "toys and games" section of their website, the Pole Dancing kit includes a chrome pole (extendible to 8ft 6ins!), a 'sexy dance garter' and a DVD showing you how to shake the goods. As the site states next to the item: "Unleash the sex kitten inside...simply extend the Peekaboo pole inside the tube, slip on the sexy tunes and away you go! Soon you'll be flaunting it to the world and earning a fortune in Peekaboo Dance Dollars". Yeah, so parents are pretty pissed. Its quite frightening how young we are sexualizing girls and boys these days. I think Chris Rock said it best about parenthood, "You gotta keep em off the pole!!"

RAD CUSTOM FIGURES

Check out this guy's KILLER custom-made figures!
His GIJOE figures are some of the best I've ever seen
and I want them really really bad.
Click here for his website, 2dToys.

BLACK SABBATH

Black Sabbath is back.....
sort of...
in 2 diff't incarnations....

First, "Black Sabbath II" (Tony Iommi, Geezer Butler, Bill Ward and Ronnie James Dio) are reforming together under the band name "HEAVEN AND HELL" and will begin touring next year! Sweet.

Second, Ozzy and the rest of Black Sabbath (Tonny, Geezer & Bill) are going to record a NEW album under the banner "Black Sabbath" as well as tour.

This is either going to rock like no one's business....
or be a collossal embarassment of metal.
Either way, I'm buying both albums and will pray to the Metal Gods until they are released.

SPIDEY COMIC NEWS

1) Apparently the Black Costume is coming back in the Spiderman titles! I'm assuming it will post-Civil War and Spidey switching sides... and probably temporary. Nonetheless, he will be wearing the Black Costume and I am stoked! I love that costume!! This pic is pretty sweet, too. It reminds me of Mike Zeck's black costume era Spiderman, which kicked so much ass I'm still sore! To check out some kickass Zeck black costume Spidey, pick up the trade "Spiderman: Kraven's Last Hunt". A classic gem!

2) Marvel finally announced who will be taking over Ultimate Spiderman after Mark Bagely leaves the title after 110 consecutive issues (a new record!). The new penciller will be none other than the talented STUART IMMONEN!! A nice choice, I think! He's solid and has a reputation for being fast and professional! Pic posted is not his Ultimate work, but from a previous regular Spiderman comic he did in 2004. I'm curious and excited to see what his stuff will look like as he has multiple styles. I really loved his Ultimate X-Men work but felt his Nextwave: Agents of H.A.T.E. style was too stylistically simplistic. Below are 2 examples of his Ultimate X-Men work.
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NOTE: I recommend reading Ultimate Spiderman but do NOT recommend Ultimate X-Men. Just read the normal X-Men if you're interested; "Uncanny X-Men", "Astonishing X-Men", and/or simply "X-Men". Email me if you want recommendations.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

STOP REMAKING CLASSICS, ASSHOLES ! !

Jesus Christ In A Dress! And the remake wave of poop just keeps on hammering away at the shores of tolerance! Apparently 20th Century Fox is making a remake of THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW (blasphemy!!!).

Ok, every year for the past 31 years, theaters around the world are PACKED full of fans to not only watch the classic film, but to participate with by dressing up as the various characters. Does that tell you there's a void out there and a desire to see this film REMADE? I don't think so. I think its tells us the original is fucking just fine and nobody wants to see another. I think it also tells us just how badly Hollywood has been infiltrated with unimaginitive douchebags who don't have a fucking clue about anything. It gets better - they have offered the role of Dr. Frank-N-Furter to Marilyn Manson.

Honestly, I can't even get past the remake news part to comment on the casting choice. I was considering doing a post on what movies should never be remade. But screw that! Some hollywood exec will just print out the JimSmash page and make them all. It wouldn't be the first time something like that has happened. Remember, JimSmash can be used for both GOOD and EVIL, folks.

TWISTED CHRISTMAS

Oh my goodness!
Guess who's coming to the House of Blues Sunset Strip?!
TWISTED SISTER!!!
That's right, Dee Snyder
and all the other original members are back to rock the house!
Man, I think I may have to go to this....

HARRY POTTER VS STAR WARS

This is supposed to show how Harry Potter rips off Star Wars.
Its humorous.

Although, Star Wars "rips off" several myths and the Hero's Journey; its one of the reasons why it works so well.

Anyway, click the image to enlarge and have a chuckle!

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

KNIGHT KOSTUME

Struggling for a good Halloween costume this year? Well have no fear, the Hoff is here! Yes, they are selling a "Knight Rider: Michael Knight" costume. WTF?

HALLOWEEN SPIRIT ON TV (OR LACK OF)

I just wanted to take the time to publicly thank both AMC and THE FAMILY CHANNEL for actually playing HALLOWEEN themed movies during October! I know, its crazy isn't it? Remember when Network television (and even Cable) would show lots of scary movies during October? Now... NOTHING. Its really sad. Halloween is quite possibly my favorite holiday and season of the year! Maybe its because we've tried to make Halloween so safe for children (doing it on another day besides Halloween.... doing it before it gets dark, etc) that kids are growing up not giving a fuck about it.

Whatever the case, the holiday is diminishing down to just another adult drunken event like New Years Eve. So THANK YOU AMC & FAMILY CHANNEL for keeping the Holiday Spirit alive and well!!!!

You have a few more days to get into the Halloween spirit... so if you're not already renting the flicks, tune in this week and catch great holiday movies like HALLOWEEN, FRIDAY THE 13TH, CHUCKY FLICKS... even fun family films like HOCUS POCUS. Whatever floats your boat.
Just watch and get in the spirit!!!!

JIMSMASH ARCHIVES: CENOBITES

In honor of Halloween and the Hellraiser remake news, I re-present to you the Cenobite Villain of the Day post!

Click here

YODA DAWG

Usually I'm not into the "cute pet in costume" picture.

Kind of like I'm not really into the "cute baby in a costume" pics you seen on Hallmark cards.




This however, cracked me the fuck up!

MARS ROVER BEGINNING TO HATE MARS

NASA Jet Propulsion Laboratory scientists overseeing the ongoing Mars Exploration Rover Mission said Monday that the Spirit's latest transmissions could indicate a growing resentment of the Red Planet. "Spirit has been displaying some anomalous behavior," said Project Manager John Callas, who noted the rover's unsuccessful attempts to flip itself over and otherwise damage its scientific instruments. "And the thousand or so daily messages of 'STILL NO WATER' really point to a crisis of purpose."

Continue here - it funny.
Make Jimmy laugh.
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*thanks, Eric!

VENOM FACE

Here is a semi-first look at VENOM in the upcoming Spidey 3 movie. I say "semi" because its a pic of a mini-bust statue based on the movie. So who knows how accurate it is.... also, its not painted, so it could be a prototype. Personally, I'm relieved it doesn't have a huge mouth with giant gnarled teeth everywhere and a monster tongue out of a Japanese Hentai movie. But hey, some people prefer the McFarlane Venom (like me), others prefer the Larson "Overfiend" version. Comic dorks will understand what I just said.

Monday, October 23, 2006

SPOCK'S MOM DIES

JANE WYATT has passed away friday in her sleep from natural causes. Most nerds will remember her as Spock's human mother. She played the character once in the original TV series and then also reprised the role in Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home.
She was 96.
More here.

HELLRAISER REMAKE

Ok, so I think everyone knows that I fucking hate remakes.

Well, they are remaking HELLRAISER, which is really really stupid. For one, the film is just fine the way it is. Sure its a low-budget movie, but that's part of the charm and success. And besides, when they made HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II, they summed up the 1st one in the first 12minutes then expanded upon it making it the perfect solid Hellraiser movie. There was no need for any of the horrible sequels (III and on) and there's no reason for a remake! The only GOOD thing is that the Weinsteins approached Clive Barker and offered him the writing duties on the remake, which he took. I guess he'd rather remake it than watch some hack butcher his work.... he's probably tired of seeing the sequels do that. So, we're going to get another HELLRAISER film by Clive Barker but with a much much larger budget; the first one had a budget of $900,000 - think about it, Jim Carrey gets fucking $20million per film alone. I'm very curious to see how this plays out. Will he recast Doug Bradley to once again be PINHEAD? Will the Cenobites look the same? (they are PERFECT, btw).

In honor of this news and Halloween quickly approaching, I'm going to give out some homework for this week:

RENT AND WATCH "HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II".

or I'll TEAR YOUR SOUL APART!!!!
You can netflix it here.

MOVIE REVISITS: GOOD WILL HUNTING & ROCKY

Yesterday I was a total couch potato as I recovered from the Maiden concert, haha. Anyway, we watched GOOD WILL HUNTING and ROCKY, back to back. It wasn't planned that way, but that's what happened. Both great flicks and watching them together like that was interesting as they both deal with similar themes. Or maybe cause they're both New England stories of love and life. *Shrug* I always forget how freaking good ROCKY is, tho! I tend to remember Rocky by the 3rd and 4th one where they're cheezie... awesome, but cheezie nonetheless. ROCKY I and II are full on drama films, opposed to popcorn flicks. So if you're looking for something to watch, I recommend Good Will Hunting and Rocky. Give em another spin. Plus, Rocky VI is just around the corner!

IRON MAIDEN RULEZ !

Aw, Yeah! I caught the IRON MAIDEN show this past saturday night in Irvine! It was their last show of the U.S. Tour. Holy crap, it was absolutely INCREDIBLE! So much so, I regret using the word "incredible" so haphazardly in the past! They played the entire album "A MATTER OF LIFE & DEATH", plus some classics like "2 Minutes To Midnight". However, we were all shocked that they ended the show without playing "The Trooper" nor "The Number of the Beast." WTF? Bah, regardless the entire experience rocked beyond belief. I cannot recall the last time I've been with so many UNITED people! And Bruce Dickenson proved once again that he is the best current Metal frontman!!

The set kicked ass; the stage looked like they were playing down in a WWI trench, the drummer embedded in the trench wall behind the rest of the band. Above and behind the "trench" was silhouettes of bombarded building walls, back lit with an eerie red glow. During the concert, a giant tank rose from behind, turning its large barrel towards the audience. The tank canopy opens and a large Eddie emerges while the band rocks out. Below the giant tank prop, on each side of the drummer were 2 large tapestries with the print of tank treads and they rotated down and forward, giving the illusion the Eddie Tank was moving forward on the battlefield with the band jamming in front. It was fucking awesome!

They sounded amazing and I'm digging this new era of Maiden; their sound is more complex and mature, yet still keeping with their traditional sound, storytelling, numerous time changes and lengthy instrumental sections. I recommend picking up their latest album "A MATTER OF LIFE & DEATH" (It's actually in the top 10 US charts! Can you recall the last time a metal album did that?!). Listen to it loud and in one sitting as its a semi-concept album. I wish they were still on tour, because I'd take some time off and follow them around!

JIM'S VIEW OF MAIDEN ERAS:
1) FLEDGLING ERA - This was pre-Bruce Dickenson. It's classic early Metal with a foot in Punk. Albums: "Iron Maiden" and "Killers"

2) CLASSIC ERA - Bruce Dickenson joins the band and they ascend to the top of the Metal Pantheon as far as I'm concerned.
Albums: "Number of the Beast", "Piece of Mind", "Somewhere In Time", "Powerslave", "Live After Death" and "Seventh Son of A Seventh Son". Buy all of these now!

3) BLAH ERA - After "Seventh Son", Maiden was tired and needed a creative break, IMO. They released 2 albums that were ok, but the magic was gone. Then Bruce left the band to pursue some side projects. He left under good terms, it was just time to move onto other things for a bit.
Albums: "No Prayer For The Dying" and "Fear of the Dark"

4) PRETENDER-TO-THE-THRONE ERA - Bruce was gone doing his thing and Nirvana had officially killed and buried Metal. But the rest of Maiden kept going and doing their thing as best they could with a new singer. Maiden without Bruce just isn't Maiden. This era isn't even worth checking out, as far as I'm concerned.

5) RESURRECTION - Like Maiden's mascot, Eddie, they returned from the grave! Bruce came back in 2002. The band evolved and grew. Their "new sound" is more complex and with a new level of maturity and wisdom that comes with age and experience. I fucking dig it!
Albums: "BRAVE NEW WORLD", "DANCE OF DEATH" and "A MATTER OF LIFE & DEATH"


Another aspect of why Maiden is so fucking awesome is that they've always had killer album art, usually by Derek Riggs. Below are some of my favorite album art by Riggs, whether it be the album cover, inside with the liner notes or a single record.I always wanted a book showcasing Riggs' Maiden art and they are just now finally making my wish come true! Run For Cover: The Art Of Derek Riggs!!!
You can Pre-order the book now, for shipping in early December.
If you're in Europe, order from www.eddiesmegastore.com for cheaper shipping from the UK.
If you're in America or Australasia, order from www.derekriggs.com for cheaper shipping from the US.
Iron Maiden official site.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Be reborn with JimSmash!

IF HUMANS DISAPPEARED . . .

Um, what about the mutants rising from the underground and inheriting the planet? And the religion they would create worshipping JimSmash? All Eloi will want for nothing. Clothes and food will be provided. But when the JimSmash sirens roar, simply walk slowly to the nice metal doors over yonder.....
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*snagged from CasualSlack!

CELEBRITY STAR WARS



"Pity the fool, I do!"



Click here for more.

NOSFERATU FOR YOU

Look at how much JimSmash loves you all!
Here is the entire classic NOSFERATU movie for you to watch! Enjoy!!


...before its taken off by the copyright police!
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*thanks, Bry!

HALLOWEEN COSTUME FOR SURI

Dress up the spawn of TomKat!!
Yes, even alien babies celebrate Halloween, so dress up Suri in various classic alien costumes! I chose the ALIEN because I'm a total freak that way. But there's also ALF, Mars Attacks and others!

Click here to dress the lil monster!

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*thanks, SheShe!

FLAGS OF OUR FATHERS

Clint Eastwood's
FLAGS OF OUR FATHERS
opens today.

Go see it.
(plus I hear the FX are good. heh)

FRAGGLE ROCK THE MOVIE

Attn: Fraggle Rock fans!
They are developing a full-length live-action musical fantasy of Fraggle Rock. Personally, I was never into them... I was strictly a Muppets fan myself. Not that I didn't like FR, I just never watched it. Maybe I was a year or two too old? I dunno. Anyway, several of my friends love FR, so this post is for you! Unfortunately (maybe) the film will include the puppets travelling from beneath the Rock and venture into the human world for the first time. Sounds pretty shitty to me - wasn't the charm of the show the underground world they lived in? Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that kind of like making a Planet of the Apes movie, but have the apes travel to a planet of lizards? Chime in, Fraggle Rock fans! Lemmie know what you think!!! The movie will be produced by Ahmet Zappa.

CROSS SECTIONS ARE NEAT-O

I really dig Cross Sections
(the Star Wars Cross Section books are really neat and I recommend picking them up, or atleast flipping through em the next time you're at a bookstore).

Anyway, check out this awesome Cross Section of the Colonial Marine Dropship, as seen in the best movie ever made: ALIENS. The artist says on his site, " I am trying to use this artwork to secure a commission to illustrate a Cross Sections book about the craft of the Alien franchise." Oh sweet Jeebus, that would Rule. His illustrations are for sale, so someone buy me that Dropship, yo!

Click here for more by the artist.

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*thanks, Andrew!

Thursday, October 19, 2006

LUCAS AND COLBERT

George Lucas on the Colbert Report:

FLAMING BAG OF POO

Get in the holiday spirit with
"STOMP THE FLAMING BAG OF POO!"

Click here to play.


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*thanks, Ted!

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

SICK SKATING

Snagged this from J's Place:


SEMI-HERO OF THE DAY: SOME LADY

Today's "Semi-Hero of the Day" goes to the woman who served Lindsay Lohan a subpoena while she was on the red carpet at the Annual American Cinematheque Award. Lohan, the human waste of space, was walking the carpet when she was approached by a woman she assumed was an autograph seeker and said to her, "You're my first autograph!" to which the woman answered "You've been served" and handed her the subpoena. Hahaha, awesome! According to witnesses Lindsay then dropped the paperwork and chased after the process server. Love it.
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*the subpoena: to testify at her mother's trial
(who's being sued for fraud, theft, and violation of contract).

THE DAY OF JASON

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JASON ! ! !MAY YOU HAVE A GLORIOUS DAY OF
PILLAGING, GAMBLING AND DRAGON-SLAYING!