Friday, January 11, 2008

HATING THE PREDALIEN


9 THINGS THAT BUG ME ABOUT
THE PREDALIEN
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1) "IT'S NOT A HYBRID!"
While I'm not a fan of the concept of the Alien taking on physical attributes of its host (an idea grunted out by someone during the production from Hell that was Alien 3), I understand it is now pretty much part of the mythos (sigh). However, the Predalien is referred to as a HYBRID and looks the part. This is inaccurate. Were the previous aliens Human-Alien hybrids? No. They were simply Aliens. If the Predalien was the result of gene-splicing, a scientific construct, then ok. But no, it is the result of a facehugger using a Predator as HOST. If anything, MINOR physical attributes would be there... basically just the mandibles (ie jaw structure). The Predalien, as it is as a Hybrid, makes no sense. It should simply be an Alien, from a Predator host.
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2) THE DREADLOCKS. Ok, I get that most people wanted the dreadlocks. Personally I think its a stupid idea, but whatever. What bugs me about the dreadlocks are A)It shouldn't have them. Why does the Predalien take on so much of the Predator's attributes when it doesn't do so with Humans? Their mere presence are an abomination, B)They arc up and out, bouncing with each step... its silly. And C)The texture of the dreadlocks. The Predator's are smooth and you're not sure of what they are... not necessarily hair. The Predaliens looks like he had his hair braided at a sleepover. If you look at some of the previz art, most have the smooth dreadlocks and it works so much better. I still hate the idea of an alien with dreads, tho.
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3) PUMPKINHEAD ALIENS.
Or "The loss of the Biomechanical". This is the biggest offense of the Alien Saga, including the Aliens as well. Begininning with Alien 3, the creature has lost the biomechanical aspect, which to me is essential and what makes the Alien stand out from any other "monster" of film. The Aliens and Predalien now look like PUMPKINHEAD; soft and fleshy. Makes sense since the ADI guys have been in charge of the Aliens' look since Alien 3. Plus they worked on Pumpkinhead (pre-ADI), but Tom Woodruff Jr (ADI co-creator) is inside Pumpkinhead and the aliens from Alien3-on. If the Predalien was biomechanical like Giger's first Alien, it would be so much easier to swallow. Like so...
[Black & Biomechanical Predalien - still lame, but a huge improvement]


*Note: With the Film version, they DID incorporate a slight element of biomech... the clear dome on the forehead.

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4) THE COLORING.This goes kind of with the previous bitch-moan about the lack of Biomechanical. The current coloring looks too much like a Predator; yellows and greens. If this is to be an ALIEN (that came from a Predator host), then it should be BLACK and look like an EXOSKELETON. Now it looks fleshy and almost wooden. Do a repaint and make the Predalien BLACK and my guess is it would look alot better.
*See above Black/Biomechanical pic.
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5) HEAD SHAPE. One of the obvious, classic aspects of the Alien design is its elongated shaped head. The Predalien's design abandons this, with the back of the head shorter and tapered off. To me, it looks very similar to the crappy "Alien Queen" toy from Kenner's silly '90s line. I really think that making the back of the head more "Alien-like" would improve the design and slightly lessen my hatred of the Predalien. Slightly.
[ Incorporating Alien head drastically improves design ]
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6) OVER-SIZED MANDIBLES. Jesus christ, they're huge and look like parts from another, larger creature glued on. I have no problem with the Predalien having the jaw structure of a Predator. It makes sense and could be cool. But these are waaaaay too large and look silly. They look like two plastic toy grabby-arms stuck to the sides of his head! "Pinch! Pinch! Grab! Grab!"
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7) NEW LIFE-CYCLE BULLSHIT. With the Predalien, gone is the need for facehuggers. Now the Predalien pukes chestbursters down the throat of its victims (pregnant women) and the chestbursters then explode out of the womb. The change makes no sense. The directors' excuse is because "we do not know how Predators procreate". That is irrelevant. The Aliens' life cycle is its own without any relation to the host it gestated in. With their line of thinking, why do the Aliens -that come out of Humans- procreate with a Queen, eggs and facehuggers? The Predalien's new lifecylce makes no sense except for the directors wanting to do something different and put their take on the mythos. Plus its LAME and tasteless. Oh, and in addition, the Predalien goes from Chestburster to Full-Size Adult within minutes. sigh.

NOTE: "Crookymike" brought up a good point in the Comments section... "If the Predalien took on predator characteristics, why attack pregnant women? Clearly a no-no as seen in Predator 2." Good point... the Predator in Predator 2 does NOT kill Leona it scans her and discovers she's pregnant.
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8) THE PHYSIQUE. You can really tell its a dude in a suit now... not just because its, well, a dude in a suit, but by the new physical design changes. Again, when they ditched the biomechanical elements, they replaced it with thick, meaty, muscular body parts. The Predalien (and aliens now, too) are thick beasts ready to wrestle. Aliens are tall and skinny.
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9)PREDATOR BEHAVIOUR.Besides the insulting new procreation methods, the Predalien looked and acted too much like a Predator. And back to the "Not a Hybrid" point again, it's supposed to be an Alien that came out of a Predator. Its not a result of an Alien and Predator gettin' it on, so why does it look SO much like a Predator? Why does it have that "warrior/hunter" attitude? I understand the concept of the Alien taking on some attributes of its host, but would it really fight mano-a-mano? Would it skin its victims and hang them from the ceiling? The Predalien is THIS close to running around in armor, using weapons and mimicking voices.

*Note: The skinning of the Predators by the Predalien was cut out of the final theatrical edit, but it gives you an idea of the approach to the creature.
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Overall, I really hate the Predalien, primarily because of the origins tied to the visuals. I would have little problems with the current design if it was an actually hybrid, created through gene-splicing. But no, it came from a normal chestburster, delivered via facehugger like every other Alien. If its an ALIEN, then it should look like one. I've said before that I'd simply want an alien -that came out of a Predator- to look like a normal Alien (Giger's ALIEN or Stan Winston's ALIENS) but with small mandibles incorporated into the jaw (not glued to the side).

More Alien elements. No Dreadlocks. Much smaller mandibles. Return to normal Alien procreation. Bring back the biomechanical and black coloring.

Here is the JimSmash Predalien:
[ The JimSmash Predalien - Normal Alien with small mandibles ]---
Here's an EARLY PRE-VIZ DESIGN of the Predalien. This I don't mind so much. It still keeps with the overall ALIEN look, but incorporates enough PREDATOR attributes to make it stand out on its own as a new creature without insulting the fans too much. Have it black and biomechanical and it would have worked....
.....the mandibles are still too large, though! Ha!

* Please note the tongue-in-cheek tone, that is constant on this blog, and stop sending me hate mail.





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JimSmash Movie Review: AVP-R