Monday, August 13, 2007

SOME HOLLYWOOD BULLSHIT

1) Some news about JURASSIC PARK 4 has come out.... the plot includes the government training dinosaurs to use/carry weapons on the battlefield. Wow. (link)
For the record, I CALLED IT.....ok, Bill Watterson called it.

2) The direct-to-video sequel LOST BOYS 2 will star original FROG BROTHERS and both COREYS. Because, you know, they were the strongest aspects of the kickass first movie. Sigh. Also, Keifer Sutherland's half-brother, Angus Sutherland, will be the villain. The plot is surfer town attacked by vampires. Joy. (link)

3) Yes, they are making a live-action VOLTRON movie. I assume the LION one, not the lame 900 different vehicles. Is this a part of growing up? Watching unimaginative, talentless schlubs rape your inner child? (link)

4) Stubbornly intent on making the worst GIJOE live-action movie (and destroying yet another sliver of Jimmy's soul), it looks like fucking STEPHEN "Van Helsing" SOMMERS is set to direct the upcoming abomination. Look for it on the $3 dvd spindle at your local gas station soon. (link)

5) They are remaking Bruce Lee's "ENTER THE DRAGON". Blapshemy. Burn heathens, burn. (link)

6) Tried to watch Sci-Fi's new FLASH GORDON tv show on friday. This was so fucking bad, I can't even post about it properly. God, it was fucking awful, amateurish and insulting. Sci-Fi needs to stick to AIRING sci-fi, not making their own... which is shitty. Seriously, was this some executives teenager's pet project? "Here's a cheap camcorder, son... go make me a Flash Gordon tv show!"

...and a dash of GOOD NEWS: Looks like New Line Cinema and Peter Jackson are trying to make friends a bit so Jackson can make THE HOBBIT. Thank god. I hope Jackson does it. It'd be a nice rounded Saga. No word on the supposed "news" that Sam Raimi was going to direct it.... maybe after Spiderman 3 came out, NLC reconsidered their director choice.... Emo Bilbo. Shudder. (link)
UPDATE: Sam Raimi directing, Peter Jackson producing???? (source)

UPDATE 2: Stephen Sommers will NOT be the director of the GIJoe movie... apparently he was asking for too much money.

2 comments:

Lisa said...

Wow - how do you really feel about Flash Gordon? YIKES! Yeah, there are better shows, and Ming wasn't very Ming-like. Sure, it was kind of low-budget. The acting was weak in spots. But I did think it was better than the Painkiller Jane series.

Anonymous said...

emo bilbo! LOL I almost spewed my morning coffee!