HILLBILLY TV

Move over DOG THE BOUNTY HUNTER, I think there may be a new king of asinine hillbilly television. Forgive me if this is old news, but I rarely watch TV and just stumbled upon this last night.

Ted "I kill stuff" Nugent has his own tv show called "TED OR ALIVE". From what little I saw last night, its a reality contestant show where dumbasses learn the gospel truth from Teddy on how to be a true red-blooded American WARRIOR. Or, as Teddy's website says:

"Five city slickers are given a challenge: Spend a week in the wilderness competing against one another in challenges of survival and outdoor skill. Challenges are worth points. The more challenges you win, the more points you earn. The person with the most points at the end of the week will win $25,000. There is a catch: Putting these successful, smart, capable players through the challenges is one of the greatest forces of nature ever unleashed: Ted Nugent, Rock and Roll Wildman turned political conservative and great white hunter."

The challenge I saw last night was 4 "city slickers" in overalls and straw hats climbing up onto crosses (ala being crucified) and trying to outlast one another in an endurance race; who is the last to stay up there. Long dull story short: The winner won by SPITTING LOOGIES onto the last remaining guy up on the cross. Ted, of course, praised the Warrior for his skills. Ah, HONOR. Its what makes this great country great.

Dear Ted,
Fuck you and all you stand for.

This is yet another reason why I don't watch television.

Click here for his website. Wow.