INTERGALACTIC SHARP-SHOOTERS

** Click on image to enlarge **
*If you get this joke, you are a dork.

I find it hilarious!

80s TRENT REZNOR

Click here to watch an embarrASSing clip of a young Trent Reznor performing Billy Idol's "Eyes Without A Face" in the 80s. Ugh - View at your own risk!!!!
*This one was for you, Ali!

THE LAST TRUE JEDI

As per Maker's request (and slight scolding), I give you the new and proper "Last TRUE Jedi/Samurai" pic - this time with Luke's head instead of Tom "Crazed Lunatic" Cruise. The other blasphemous pic has been removed. I apologize to all the JimSmash fans for letting them down.

BAD DATES

Sweet! Archaeolgists have discovered a pharaonic sun temple with supposed statues of King Ramses II under a Cairo marketplace! The partially uncovered site is the largest sun temple ever found in the area, where the ancient city of Heliopolis was once located.

No word on any Snake Chambers.

DARREN MCGAVIN DIES

Aw, man... DARREN MCGAVIN passed away on saturday, too! I think most of us will always remember him as "the Old Man", the grouchy, cursing dad in A Christmas Story!!!! Of course, I will also remember him for RAW DEAL, with Schwarzenegger - great 80s cop movie! hehe. McGavin was 83.

DON KNOTTS PASSED AWAY

Man, I hate to start the day and week off with such sad news as this, but if you hadn't heard already, our beloved DON KNOTTS passed away saturday. I grew up fondly watching The Andy Griffith Show, and Knotts will always be Barney Fife to me....or Mr Furely from Three's Company, heh. Knotts was almost like a family member (hey, I grew up in front of the tv, what do you expect?!). I am truly and deeply saddened by this news.
He will be missed dearly. He was 81.

jimsmash.blogspot.com burstin' with goodness!

BATTLESTAR GALACTICA: THE COMIC

Battlestar Galactica is once again making its way to comic form, this time from Dynamite Entertainment. It's written by Greg Pak, who did a great job with the X-Men: Phoenix Endsong miniseries last year. You can pick up #0 for only 25-cents, at your local comic book store. It's available in 2 covers: Photo cover and one pencilled by Steve McNiven, who kicks ass.

This isn't the first time for Galactica to be in a comic. Marvel had a series in the late 70s

and Liefeld had a short godawful run in the 90s.

Predictions? This will suck, like most movie/tv-to-comic comics in the past, like Star Wars and Farscape. It's pencilled by Rigel Raynor, who I'm not familiar with at all. But I'll pick it up to give a looksee!!!! Jason & Kent, you should pick this up - being a comic, it won't have any camera zooms to annoy you.

TOP 10 GAY ANIMATED CHARACTERS

Swing over to Mr. Legs' SquirrelHarem to check out his "Top 10 Gay Animated Characters" post.

Hilarious, Steve!!

GINCHY BATCAVE ! !

All-Star Batman and Robin #4 will have a sweet 6-page spread of the Batcave, drawn by Jim Lee. Click on the image to enlarge, or click here for a bigger pic. Looks pretty sweet. The comic title itself is fucking god awful and unreadable thanks to the shitty writing Frank Miller is leaking out of his bum. But the pictures sure are perty!
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*what's with my Potty Mouth lately?

SILVER SURFER SATRIANI

In honor of JOE SATRIANI's 20th anniversary of being a guitar guru, I thought I'd post the cover to his album "Surfing With The Alien", which has the SILVER SURFER on it! Sweet.

Satriani will release his 12th album, "Super Colossal" on March 14, 2006.

SPIDERMAN 3 POSTER

Here's a teaser poster for SPIDERMAN 3. It's not a black/white photo, nor color corrected - Spidey is in a BLACK costume in the flick.

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Click to enlarge.

Hmmm, cool idea, but
I would have loved to see the actual original black costume!!!!!!

DO-IT-YOURSELF LASER EYE SURGERY ! !

Spice up your bookshelves and freak out visitors with some crazy bookcovers, such as "How to Turn Your Grandmother Into A Pornstar".

Click here for more!

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*thanks, Ali - hilarous!!!

SHOUT AT THE DEVIL - plus

Awesome - JimSmash's web counter just hit 6666!!!

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*thanks for the head's up, Mr. Legs!

NEW AQUAMAN

JUSTIN HARTLEY has replaced Will Toale as Aquaman in the upcoming TV show. The decision is releated to the merger between UPN and WB. Why am I even reporting on this? Ugh.

VITALIC - BIRDS

Got this from Squirrel Harem.
"The Greatest Music Video of All-Time".
Click here to watch!

AUDIO is essential.

ISUZU GEMINI

Who needs CG when you can grab a bunch of insane stunt mutherfuckers?!

Click here to watch.
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*Thanks, Jason!

UPDATE: SPIDEY BANDIT

Lisa sent me a link to cbs news with the piece about the comic shop being robbed by the Spiderman chump. Click here to watch it. Oh man!!! As soon as it started I recognized the store!! It was DREAMWORLD COMICS - just up the street from work!! We went there for their opening 2yrs ago. We also would drool over the comics that were stolen: Amazing Fantasy #15 (Spidey's 1st appearence ever), Fantastic Four #1 and X-Men #1. Tears run down my face just typing this. Man, I REALLY feel for the owners of the store. They're really cool guys who have a true love for comics. I hope they catch the dick who stole em and string em up by his fanboy sack.

On a positive side - sweet Iron Maiden tshirt, dude!!!! \m/

Thanks again, Lisa!!!!!

CHUCK NORRIS

This one's old, but I never posted about it before.
But it keeps coming up in conversations.

TOP 10 FACTS ABOUT CHUCK NORRIS
"Some people wear Superman pajamas.
Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas."

Click here for more.

SPIDEY BANDIT

I heard that the News last night reported that someone dressed as Spiderman broke into a local comic shop here in LA (don't know which one), smashed in some glass cases and stole a bunch of expensive comic books - all caught on security tape!!! Whoa!! This would be hilarious if he hadn't of gotten away with it. Don't mess with local comic shops, man!!!!!!!!

I haven't found anything online about this.
If anyone finds a link email me!!

HOUSE OF FUCKED UP

Whoa - check out this inflatable House of Horrors.

NACHO-OOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Jack Black is back in a new comedy
"NACHO LIBRE" by the director of Napoleon Dynamite!

Because the Apple trailer crashes, click here to watch a small version of the trailer.

Don't know if the movie is going to be good, but the idea of Jack Black as a Mexican Wrestler is pure genius.

CHENEY'S GOT A GUN

Click here to watch "Cheney's Got A Gun"; twisted tune of Aerosmith's "Janie's Got A Gun" set to animation.

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*thanks, Maker!

APOLOGY TO TRENT REZNOR

I lashed out a few days ago regarding Nine Inch Nails and Trent's newest album, "With Teeth." I'm sorry, I was just frustrated with this current album, which I felt was too "pop" in feeling and too simplistic in structure. I don't think its a BAD album. Not at all. It's just not what I was expecting. When "With Teeth" first came out,

I listened to it several several times, probably a dozen.

I went back and have been listening to ALL of his music again and it dawned on me that this new album feels more like Pretty Hate Machine than his later albums; almost like a "missing" album post-PHM. I forgot how melodic PHM is, opposed to the hard, fast, complex multi-layered composures of Broken, Downward Spiral, and even The Fragile. While Trent's lyrics have always been strong, this album seems more lyrically driven then his previous ones. Usually, there's a nice marriage between his lyrics and the composure of "industrial electronica" (or whatever label one can apply to NIN). This outing, however, lacks the industrial feel I'm used to. I miss it, but atleast he's growing as an artist and trying new things. Yelling angry angst can only go so far I suppose. We all have to grow up eventually to a degree.

Trent's music got me through high school in one piece as well as served as my own soundtrack through college. He deserves more loyalty from me. And so, I'm giving With Teeth yet another chance. And so far, its better than I remember upon my intial reactions last year.

MOVIE REVIEW: BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN

Finally saw BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN yesterday.
Ang Lee redeems himself as a great filmmaker post-Hulk. Its nice to see him making quality films again. Overall, the movie is solid. Please drop the "That Gay Cowboy Flick" notion that's running rampart through our lame culture. This is a movie about 2 souls who love one another. That's it. Straight, Gay, whatever - its about love. The movie is gorgeous with great performances by all. It has an unspoken stillness way about it that fits perfectly with the characters, the story and the environment.

My only nitpicks are that the movie slows down a bit in the middle; just a bit. I also felt their love/passion for one another came about really fast and sudden. But that's ok - best get to it than drag it on
I suppose. Also, while there were times I truly felt their love for one another, there were other sections where I just wasn't getting it. As if I'd missed a "chapter" or something. Again, these are NITPICKS.

If you haven't seen it or you're planning on catching it on dvd,
I recommend seeing it in the theater while you can. The gorgeous landscapes on the big screen are almost worth the price of admission alone. But the story is good, too, so go see it.

Oh, another nitpick - Heath Ledger doesn't seem to age. Which can mean only one thing: He is an Immortal and will eventually have to battle other Immortals by means of Steel. There can only be One.

I give this 4 Lil Jimmys, out of 5 possible.

SHE-ROBOCOP

Stumbled upon this Japanese movie and thought I'd share: LADY BATTLE COP!!!!

"A former tennis champion is transformed into the cyborg Lady Battle Cop to do battle with Team Phantom, a quartet of killers employed by the Karuta crime gang."

Gotta love Japanese sci-fi action flicks!

TOXIC AVENGER - THE MUSICAL ? ?

Oh. Muh. Gawd.
Looks like there's a possibility of
The Toxic Avenger making its way to the Stage as a Musical!!!!
Hahahaha, awesome.

"Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, we are the entertainment for this afternoon. Now on the shotgun we've got my man Leroy. And on the cash register, we've got that magic fingers Rico. And last but not least, yours truely, Frank, on the stick."

1942: WAR ON TERROR

Today marks the anniversary of Executive Order 9066, which set about events that placed 120,000 persons of Japanese ancestry, including American Citizens, into "relocation camps". Included were my grandparents, uncle and bun-in-the-oven father, as well as other relatives. Some of my relatives were in the camps, while their husbands & fathers were in the U.S. Military fighting in WWII defending the very freedoms that were being taken away back home. Let us never forget and teach new generations of this terrible time in US History, to avoid similar acts happening in the Future.Following the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, on Feb 19, 1942, President Franklin D. Roosevelt issued Executive Order 9066, which permitted the military to circumvent the constitutional safeguards of American citizens in the name of national defense.

The order set into motion the exclusion from certain areas, and the evacuation and mass incarceration of 120,000 persons of Japanese ancestry living on the West Coast, most of whom were U.S. citizens or legal permanent resident aliens.

These Japanese Americans, half of whom were children, were incarcerated for up to 4 years, without due process of law or any factual basis, in bleak, remote camps, surrounded by barbed wire and armed guards.

They were forced to evacuate their homes and leave their jobs; in some cases family members were separated and put into different camps. President Roosevelt himself called the 10 facilities "concentration camps."

Some Japanese Americans died in the camps due to inadequate medical care and the emotional stresses they encountered. Several were killed by military guards posted for allegedly resisting orders.

At the time, Executive Order 9066 was justified as a "military necessity" to protect against domestic espionage and sabotage. However, it was later documented that "our government had in its possession proof that not one Japanese American, citizen or not, had engaged in espionage, not one had committed any act of sabotage." (Michi Weglyn, 1976).

Learn more here.

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*No, I do not know these people.

BROKEBACK EMPIRE

I've been staying clear of the dumb "Brokeback" jokes for various reasons, as well as the silly re-edits like "Brokeback To The Future."

With that said, however, here is

"Brokeback Empire!!"

ASCII WAR

Click here to watch some ascii war set to RAMMSTEIN!!!

Audio helps.



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*Thanks, Kent!

DARK CRYSTAL 2 PIC

Behold the first image from the upcoming sequel to Dark Crystal; POWER OF THE DARK CRYSTAL, directed by Genndy Tartakovsky. The pic is of an elderly KIRA. The movie is set hundreds of years after DC1.

** Click on image to enlarge **

REAL TIME RETURNS ! !

HELL YEAH!!! Tonight, "Real Time With Bill Maher" returns to HBO in its new season! So catch it tonight a 11pm (encore play mondays at 8pm)

TOOL OF THE DAY

Harry Whittington, the 78-year old man shot in the face, and heart by Cheney, has left the hospital. And what does he say about the matter? "My family and I are deeply sorry for everything Vice President Cheney and his family have had to deal with."

What a Tool.

NO CATWOMAN II - PROMISE

At Harvard's Hasty Pudding ceremonies, Halle Berry had to write "I will not make CATWOMAN II" on a chalkboard four times in order to earn her pudding pot award as Harvard's Hasty Pudding woman of the year. Awesome.

If you haven't seen it, you're lucky - Catwoman was one of the worst films ever put together. Even Halle Berry in a skimp tight black leather outfit couldn't make this even a bad film. Its just abyssmal.

MAIDEN NEWS

Iron Maiden's new live DVD, Death on the Road, will debut on the big-screen February 21 in select cities across the U.S. in a one-night-only event. This will be the North American premiere of Death on the Road, captured live during their 2003 Dance of Death Tour and filmed at the Westenfalenhalle Arena, Dortmund, Germany. The DVD will also be released in stores the same day.

Rawk!!! \m/

JANE'S ADDICTED TO MONEY

*sigh* Once again a piece of Rock's heart is cut out of its chest by artists selling out. This case: Jane's Addiction's "Jane Says" driving the latest Jack Daniels commercials. I knew Jane's Addiction were sellouts when they became MTV toilet whores in the late 90s and Dave Navarro slid on his Diva panties, but this one really pisses me off. Blow me, Jane's Addiction. You used to be cooler than cool. Now you're just another Chump. Go stand next to N'Sync and Britney in the Walmart music section, you fucking sellouts.

Breaks my heart.
But not nearly as bad as hearing the new NINE INCH NAILS album being played at an American Eagle store during their "Jean Sale" at Christmas. What happened, Trent? You used to be my God. Now you're diluted pop. I'm going to go cry now.

You know you're getting older when all your rock heroes sellout.

MULTI-TOUCH INTERACTION RESEARCH

Click here to check out a cool interactive touch screen.

Can you say "Minority Report?"

GODS OF OLYMPUS WEEP

I know this is a retread, but why is snowboarding in the Olympics? Seriously, give me a break. What's next, Nascar?

That's all. Just wanted to bash.

OLSEN TWINS ARE EVIL

Come play with us. Come play with us. Forever. And ever...

STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL

In 1978, The Star Wars Holiday Special was aired on TV. Lucas had absolutely nothing to do with it and didn't see any of it himself until, just like everyone else, saw it on TV. To which he quickly bought the rights to the show and destroyed it. Bootleg copies recorded that night have been circulating through the geek underworld for 25+years now! He has been quoted as saying, "If I had the time, I'd get a sledgehammer and destroy every copy in existence." The only way to describe the Special is "Indescribable." It's just abyssmal beyond imagination. The basic concept is Chewbacca desperately trying to make it back to his Family for "Life Day". Of course, Imperial threats are everywhere. Several original cast members are in this travesty; Harrison Ford, Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher. And its truly embarrassing seeing them in this. The Special is basically a 70s Variety show gone horribly wrong. I could go on and on about this, but instead I'll list some highlights:-The first 15 minutes: Wookiee family talking in Wookiee with NO subtitles. 15minutes. No subtitles.
-Carrie Fisher, coked out of her mind, singing and stumbling.
-Chewbacca's family, including his wife cooking in an apron.
-Chewbacca's creepy father inlaw essentially getting off on holo-porn.
-Jefferson Starship performing!
-Bea Arthur as the Cantina owner doing a musical number, singing & dancing with Walrus Man.
-Harvey Korman as an alien with a cup for a head wooing Bea Arthur.
-Harvey Korman in drag as a "4 armed Julia Child droid" doing a cooking show.You simply must see it to believe it. It probably sounds like a lot of fun, but its really not. Its pretty much impossible to watch it in one sitting and without fast forwarding.

Click here to watch Conan O'Brian give Harrison Ford shit for it.
Click here for more info.
Or do a google search for other sites.

If you haven't seen it, email me.... I might send you a copy.