7 REASONS (thus far) WHY AVP2 WILL SUCK ANUS:
In no particular order....
1) Yes, that is an
Alien on top of a car... with
scared teenagers inside. Maybe they're at Lover's Lane? Oh how a brilliant series has become
"Jason vs Freddy".
sigh.
2) It takes place on
Earth... in
modern times... in a
small town in the
U.S. I have
HUGE issues with these movies being on Earth
AND in a modern setting. Just have them on another planet
(hel-lo, it's Sci-Fi!) and if they simply must have it on Earth, have it in the
FUTURE, ala Blade Runner look/feel
(again, Sci-Fi!)... having it on earth in modern times
cheapens the mythos and turns the film into a cheezie 50s Invasion From Mars type movie. Can we say "Slither"?
(which I enjoyed, but its a different genre). When
ALIENS are involved, it should always be in the
distant future or beyond.
"ALIEN" is the first time humans have ever encountered the creature
(do the FOX people watch their own movies? I think not).
3) We're going to see the
Predator HOMEWORLD. I'm thinking something lame and looking very similar to the
Klingon homeworld as seen on
Star Trek: The Next Generation.... actually, no.... they'll probably tie it in with the lame concept of the Predators' roles with early human civilization
(as seen in AVP1) and have everything "modern pyramids".... Stargate vs Predator. Oh, and we'll probably see
Predator Mommys and
Predator babies. I simply do not have faith that this will be handled well.
4) According to the directors, "
a kid painfully and graphically dies on screen via a chestburster alien". What psycho wants to witness this scene? Off-screen, perhaps... but a full scene watching a child scream in pain as an alien bursts out of its chest, breaking bones and spraying blood in one of the most agonizing deaths ever to grace the screen? Tasteless. Rewatch Kane's infamous chestburster scene in
ALIEN and tell me if you think it's a good idea to watch a child go through that.
5) Getting back to the
small town setting again, here's a snippet from the directors: "
You've got a small-town sheriff who everyone doubts a little bit. We've got a brother story between Steven Pasquale and Johnny Lewis ['The O.C.'] ... There's also a mom returning from the war and trying to get reunited with her family and re-establishing her relationship with her daughter. She gets very Ripley-esque; she's a tough chick." UGGGHHHH!!!! Plus, having someone from the O.C. is enough for its own number on this list.
6) The main Predator is a "
Cleaner" coming to clean up the mess. He's even referred to by the director's as "
THE WOLF", ala
Pulp Fiction. No word if a female
Predator Bride hellbent on
revenge will make an appearance in
AVP3. But there's a good chance she'll make an appearance on the Predator Homeworld.
7) The "
PREDALIEN" will be in it... and yes, it has
dreadlocks. And it looks like the
1992 Kenner toy of the
Alien Queen, which was ridiculous looking. Just have the PredAlien look like a
normal Alien but give it the
mandibles. Done.
No dreadlocks.
Nooooo dreadlocks.
[ Left: PredAlien / Right: Crappy toy ]----
and just to be fair,
some "GOOD" things I've heard about the film:
* The Final Alien Vs Predator scene is in the
RAIN which could be cool visually.
*
No more lame huge Predator armor as seen in AVP1. Seriously, they looked like jacked-up steroid users in football padding. They've gone back-to-basics like the Predators looked in Predator and Predator 2... more or less.
(hopefully their faces don't look SILLY like in AVP...oops, this is the "positive" section...sorry). * The directors are using digitally remastered
audio clips from
James Cameron's ALIENS; Aliens hissing, doors opening, etc. Which is good because the
sound in Aliens ruled. But isn't that kind of cheating? Anyway, no more lameass Alien noises like in
Resurrection and
AVP! At the very least, the
Aliens will sound cool and correct.* The
Alien head is back to its
proper elongated phallic self! (unlike the crappy Resurrection & AVP shortened heads). And they are having them look more-or-less like
James Cameron's Aliens... ie no clear dome on head
(my personal favorite version by a hair). The AVP2 heads are still "off" and still look like a dude in a rubber suit, tho.
Previous AVP2 post with Trailer.
My previous AVP2 plot prediction.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JIMSMASH!!!
"TK-421.... why aren't you at your post?".jpg)
Oops! Sorry for the lacks of posts today (thurs).
By Cybertron's Moon!
Check out this new ARTFX statue depicting the "final" battle between Yoda and Palpatine from Episode III. While some of the scenes were cool (Palp Force-throwing senate seats), overall I've never liked seeing Yoda flip around kung-fu-frog style, wielding a tiny lightsaber. It's just silly to me and damages the beloved character I fell in love with in Empire.
Sweet, Police say 2 women dressed as NINJAS robbed a gas station with Samurai swords and daggers!
[ Left: PredAlien / Right: Crappy toy ]
I've just been informed that CHRISTINE HEWETT passed away after a long battle with cancer.
"THE DRAGON HAS DIED.
Oopsie! A few people at DC Comics goofed and missed the note from the penciller to insert a nice "WAYNE ENTERPRISES" name/logo onto the building. It looks like the inker even inked the note! I wonder who would handle putting in the sign... the colorist??? Panel is from NIGHTWING #135.
Aww-yeah! The REDSKINS defeated the Eagles last night! My man JASON CAMPBELL is looking good! My fellow AUBURN fans/alum know what I'm talking about, as he was our QB recently until he graduated and went pro and picked up by my home team! GIBBS back as coach and my old AU QB leading the Skins.... Life is good!
Yikes, that's a big Alien Tattoo! Anyway, I recognized the source but I'm not 100% where its from originally. I just recognized it from an old gaming magazine, so I assume its from an Aliens game. The alien's design is from the 2nd movie (ALIENS), so maybe its from ALIEN:TRILOGY back on the PS1? I remember seeing the source image about 10yrs ago I think....
From the wonderful Spice Mines of Kessel!
Holy Crap! SIDESHOW just unveiled a preview of their upcoming ALIENS DIORAMA! It's apparently part of a new diorama collection based on ALIEN(S) and Predator!!! The preview (TOP pic) only gives a glimpse, but if its anywhere near as cool as the first diorama based on ALIEN (BOTTOM pic), I'm going to fucking freak out with joy joy joy!!!! And yes, I've preordered my ALIEN diorama already.
We saw 3:20 TO YUMA this weekend. While I normally dislike the ideas of remakes and really don't care for RUSSELL CROWE, I couldn't help but like this movie through-and-through!
If you're one of those psycho SW fans who love everything Lucas grunts out, then you can buy the poster HERE.
Hey! Click us to enlarge and get a better look!
Check out these sweet pics from Bob Burns' kickass ALIEN collection!! Man I envy Bob Burns, who has the largest Alien collection ever! One day my mantel will look similar to the above... one day...
TGM HOLiC (aka Jin8) plays Tetris....
This is one of the better ALIEN Tattoos I've seen! Pretty freakin' sweet if you ask me! I instantly recognized the source, too - from the killer DOOR POSTER from back in the late 80s. I know this because I really really wanted it but never got it. Hell, I STILL want it! The door poster actually shows the Alien from Head to Toe. Crap, now I need to hunt down that poster........
* CLICK ON IMAGE TO ENLARGE & SEE BETTER *
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