THE LOST EMPIRE

YES!! Over at Andrew's blog, he has a great post about a movie I've never even heard of called "THE LOST EMPIRE". It looks absolutely fantastic!!! Just look at those screenshots! Cruise over to Andrew's pad and read more! Click HERE!

BRITNEY SPEARS IS THE ANTI-CHRIST

This is awesome and has been circulating all day on various sites, some actual news sites; Its being "reported" that BRITNEY SPEARS, while in rehab, begged KFed for a reconciliation and demanded another baby with him... then tried to hang herself with a bed sheet after writing "666" in her forehead and screaming "I am the anti-Christ!!" and freaking out the staff.

This is all untrue.... I guess. What's awesome is that you kinda need an official statement to confirm it as bullshit. I love that's she's gone so fucking looney, you can see her behaving this way. If she keeps this shit up, I may start to actually like her! Like when Tom Cruise went over the edge and became a cartoon lunatic, you kind of started liking him again. Someone must fill the CrazyTown void that Michael Jackson left. Sure he was fun, but ya just can't like a pedophile.

Here's a clip from FAMILY GUY:

Previous related post: KFed Is An Angel From Heaven

TRANSFORMERS SHOES

Who wants some AUTOBOT shoes?
Guaranteed to ward off Bullies and attract hot girls!link
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(*thanks, Lisa!!!)

MARVEL FIGURINE: THANOS

Great Googely-Moogely!

The next UK exclusive figurine from the CLASSIC MARVEL line will be the Mad Titan THANOS!!!!!! With INFINITY GAUNTLET!!! Words fail how much I simply MUST own this!!!

Previous post with pics of other Marvel Figurines. They kick balls.

(UK site)

ALIEN STATUES/MODELS MUSEUM

Oh man! This dude has put together a webpage that shows just about every single ALIEN statue and model out there, including some pretty sick customs!! Click HERE to window shop for Jimmy presents!! Gimmie Gimmie Gimmie!!!!

KISS - WOOSTYLE

Woo (of Woospace) has a super cool

1978 Bally's KISS Pinball and it totally rulez.

We've been geeking out at the killer artwork on the playfield and backboard (and KISS art in general) which has inspired the creation of these 2 Woo pieces. I dig em!!!!

http://www.woospace.blogspot.com/

SARAH CONNOR ACTRESS

I didn't realize the actress set to soon portray Sarah Connor on TV, in the "SARAH CONNOR CHRONICLES" was Lena Headey of 300. I thought she was great in 300, so I guess I'll have to atleast tune into the first episode now.

Damnit, and here I was all set to boycott the show.

GIJOE MOVIE

Well, I guess I should stop writing my GIJOE script (just kidding, I never started cause I'm a slacker) - apparently, after TRANSFORMERS wraps up, producer Lorenza de Bonaventura is jumping onto making the Joe movie. Also, he's trying tog get Mark Wahlberg to play DUKE. The movie's story will take place before the rise of COBRA and show how Cobra Commander starts his ultra-cool terrorist group. Dont' get too excited. Remember, this is still an active Kids Show and Toyline, meaning Hasbro will have final say on everything (like with Transformers), so it will be PG if we're lucky, have NO guns (maybe "laster guns") and Cobra will barely be a cool evil threat. Personally I'd want it to be made for us 30-somethings who grew up on the comic/toys/show, be Rated-R, a trilogy and the coolest shit we'd would ever see our your lifetime. BAH!!!!

(source)

CASE OF THE MONDAYS

and God Damn do I have em B-A-D today.
Ugggghhhhhhh.....

DVD REVIEW: STRANGER THAN FICTION

Finally saw Will Ferrell's STRANGER THAN FICTION. I had heard good things about it, but nothing overwhelming, so my expectations were pretty middle of the road. I think this is Ferrell's best movie so far. I always thought he was more of a "Steve Martin" comedian. Meaning, put him in a "serious" role and then let his natural comedic nuances come out through the character, opposed to being full-on silly-assault (ie ELF). The story felt very much like a Charlie Kaufman film and at one point I got up to check (it isn't), probably because it reminded me of Adaptation (another movie I enjoyed). I caught myself several times enjoying some of the camera work; framing, etc. There's a scene between Will and Maggie on a city bus with fun camera work that made me smile! The cast is wonderful; Ferrell, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Dustin Hoffman and the always lovely Emma Thompson (I love her) with a cameo by the fanastic Linda Hunt!! The writing is fun and quarky (although sometimes a bit too much, but even then you allow it with a smile). On a side note, I really noticed the set designs in almost every shot. Weird, since that's something I normally don't pay attention to (maybe Woo's work is influencing me more than I realized. shrug). It's not perfect, by any means, and tries too hard for its own good at times. It also stumbles every once in awhile into the Cliche - I am so tired of the crazy larger-than-life girl who teaches the stiff stuffy man how to enjoy life - but the characters are so likeable, you forgive its minor flaws.

Anyway, in the end, we both really enjoyed this movie and it made me think about my own life, which is a good thing. One of the more enjoyable movies I've seen lately. Don't let the bad commercials fool you. I recommend giving it a rental!

If you liked the below, you'll probably like STRANGER THAN FICTION:
ADAPTATION
PUNK DRUNK LOVE
ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND
LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE

MEXICAN WEREWOLF IN TEXAS

So last night we went to the local yummy pizza shop down the street. While we were waiting, we strolled into the evil establishment that is Blockbuster, to kill time. Sure, we took a life oath to boycott the slimy, corn-infested poop log that is Blockbuster, but we thought we'd "window shop" for future Netflixing. Anyway, I had forgotten that Blockbuster's selection has a TON of shitty C and D-list movies that you've never heard of... comprising about 30% of their store inventory. One such movie lept off the shelves at me and made me laugh - MEXICAN WEREWOLF IN TEXAS, with the tagline "Terror has JUST crossed the Border." Wow. You can watch the trailer HERE. What cracks me up, is this seems oddly similar to the plot to AVP2. I shit you not. I think I'd prefer to see this werewolf movie instead.

NEW SHOW . . .

. . . another stretch of weekend working. . .
(why do I do this again?)

ALIEN 3: WHAT WENT WRONG ?

God, that image above (from ALIEN 3).... the moment I saw that in the theater, which was about 45 seconds in, I knew the movie was going to piss me off. Andrew's posted on his blog a really neat post about
"What Went Wrong With ALIEN 3". He addresses some of the annoying continuity problems that plague the movie and also gives a sequel scenario he and his buddy came up with years ago. Its a great post and got my blood pumping! I will now have to watch the extended cut of ALIEN 3 once again. So go check it out HERE!!!!----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
* Andrew's blob, "Be Still My Blog of War" is here. Bookmark it now!

CRIMSON GUARDS

There is no higher level of Elite or Honor.
Talk to your local Cobra Recruiter TODAY!
"COBRA!!!"

KISS AT WIZARD WORLD LA

HOLY SHIT!!

I just found out that KISS founders GENE SIMMONS and PAUL STANLEY will be at WIZARD WORLD Los Angeles, at the GOLDEN APPLE COMICS booth!!!

I must get them to sign my DESTROYER Vinyl cover!!!!!!

CAVEMEN ON TV

You know those Geico commercials with the Caveman? Yeah, I actually think they're pretty funny, too. Well ABC plans to take the concept and turn it into a 30min weekly TV show! Cute commmercials, but doomed TV show, me thinks.



Plus, a good portion of profit should go to PHIL HARTMAN'S estate since he did this joke in 1988 with UNFROZEN CAVEMAN LAYWER:100,000 years ago, a caveman was out hunting on the frozen wastes when he slipped and fell into a crevasse. In 1988, he was discovered by some scientists and thawed out. He then went to law school and became... UNFROZEN CAVEMAN LAWYER

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I'm just a caveman." "I fell on some ice and later got thawed out by some of your scientists."

"Your world frightens and confuses me! When I see my image on the security camera at the country club, I wonder, are they stealing my soul? I get so upset, I hop out of my Range Rover, and run across the fairway to the clubhouse, where I get Carlos to make me one of those martinis he's so famous for, to soothe my primitive caveman brain. "

"But there is one thing I do know. When a man like my client slips and falls on a sidewalk in front of a public library, then he is entitled to no less than two million in compensatory damages and two million in punitive damages."

"Thank you."

The man was a comedic genius. God I miss him.

SERENITY SIGHTING ON BATTLESTAR

Andrew posted on his blog that in the pilot episode of BATTLESTAR GALACTICA (current series), you can see Firefly's SERENITY ship flying over Caprica! Cool!!!!

Cruise over to his blog, "BE STILL MY BLOG OF WAR" where he has some other goodies posted!

PARAMOUNT HATES US ALL

The pain just won't stop.
PARAMOUNT has now sold its last shred of soul and has jumped on the "No Talent or Imagination Bandwagon", creating a NEW Division within that will solely develop & produce SEQUELS, PREQUELS and REMAKES.

Top of the list: Beverly Hills Cop, Crocodile Dundee, Clueless, Collateral, Coming to America, Days of Thunder, Deep Impact, Event Horizon, Face/Off, Forrest Gump, Ghost, Grease, Indecent Proposal, Tomb Raider, Mean Girls, Mission: Impossible, School for Scoundrels, Star Trek, The Addams Family, The Brady Bunch Movie, The Italian Job, The Longest Yard, The School of Rock, and Top Gun.

I really don't know if I can be apart of the Hollywood Machine any longer. Anyone interested in hiring a witty hyper-dorky blogger? It's time to make JimSmash my professional career.

(source)

SCANNERS REDUX

Man, JimSmash is quickly becoming a REMAKE HELL website. Apologies if you're tired of hearing about all this shite, but I feel I must continue to vocalize my disdain and frustrations. Anyway, the next remake news is David Cronenberg's 1981 SCANNERS, which will be directed by Darren Lynn Bousman (Saw II, III and upcoming IV). Remaking Scanners is like making a movie out of a 30sec commercial. The only redeeming (and rememberable) factor of the movie is.... well, you know what it is.

WATCH:

There, now you've seen everything you would ever need to see and know of SCANNERS. No need to see the original (or sequels) or the remake.
I just saved you time and money. JimSmash (and Michael Ironside) rulez.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DYLAN ! ! ! !

DYLAN VS. THE BIRTHDAY DOLPHINHAPPY BIRTHDAY, DYLAN!!!!!!
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Who's this Dylan guy?