Monday, March 31, 2008

ATHF INTRO - MASTODON


*AUDIO IS ESSENTIAL*

BATMAN KILLING JOKE RE-COLORED

I've been impatiently awaiting the hardcover printing of BATMAN: THE KILLING JOKE, by Alan Moore and Brian Bolland. It's one of - if not THE - best Batman stories in the last 20years. The book finally came out and to my dismay, the artwork has been tweaked and the entire book recolored by Bolland himself.

Originally, in 1988, Bolland was [apparently] behind on schedule so John Higgins (Watchmen) was brought in to color the book. Higgins' coloring and color choices were not in line with Bolland's original vision, which is why Bolland has recolored it for the hardcover release.

I have to say, I prefer Higgin's coloring. It was trippy, dramatic, emotional and felt like the Joker's psychosis spilling out onto the world, especially during the scenes within the old broken-down funhouse. The bright, overtly-vivid colors made the fear and violence of the story that much more disturbing, which played off the Joker very well. I mean, look at those pages below... the colors are quite maddening!

The new re-coloring is bland and removes so much of the drama, mood and emotion of the story. It feels like someone turned on the lights at the party. I do like the crisper pencils in this hardcover and it better showcases Bolland's fantastic artwork. But it simply does not serve the story. I think what I miss the most is the original's COLOR PALETTE more than the actual coloring itself.

In the end, I feel the story did not need any tweaking and I am not a fan of this "Special Edition" of a classic Batman tale. I'm putting my new Killing Joke hardcover up on ebay. I'll stick to the original.
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Other changes made include:
* Yellow Bat Chest-symbol no more. The yellow oval has been removed, leaving only the black bat emblem, more inline with the "Year One" look, which is what Batman is currently sporting.

* When the Joker is born, he is now bleeding out of his eyes and mouth.

* The Penguin is now in the background of a bar. Why is he in this story now? It has no baring on the story and visually disrupts the panel's composition, distracting the eye away from the subject.

* Greedo now shoots first.
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COMPARISONS:
Left is the original, Right is the re-coloring.


If you haven't read Batman: The Killing Joke before, I highly recommend it! Either find a reprint of the original, or pick up "DC Universe: The Stories of Alan Moore", which includes other awesome Alan Moore stories!

Contact LISA'S "NEPTUNE COMICS","GOLDEN APPLE COMICS" or your local comic shop to find your copy today!
(*pics from around the Net)

THOR, GOD OF METAL


*AUDIO ESSENTIAL*

JUST LIQUID PRINT ADS

"If you aren't totally clean, you're filthy."

OLD SCHOOL TURTLES, NEW

Remember when the Ninja Turtles were that "underground" black & white comic? Before the insane Global Phenomenon that turned them into annoying monsters for toddlers. Well NECA Toys have made some cool lookin' figures based on the old school artwork! Notice they all have RED bandanas?! Sweet. The toys are starting to pop up in comic & online stores.

I think NECA should make some Grayscaled figures to emulate the old comic. I would then maybe have to pick up the Leonardo figure, just cause it would be awesome.

PINEWOOD DERBY CAR: LAND SPEEDER

Luke's landspeeder is one of my favorite Star Wars vehicles. Not just because it rules, but because it was one of my first toys I remember, given to me by Santa Claus himself at my Dad's office xmas party. Santa also gave me C3-PO & Mork figures, which rode around in the speeder, but I digress. Anyway, check out this awesome custom-made pinewood derby car, by Brian Nichols who writes:

"I thought I would share my old Pinewood Derby car. I made this when I was 10 years old, back in 1997. It may not have won anything (if I can remember, I made it to one of the final rounds but just wasn't fast enough), but it is still one of my favorites" (source)

I'd say he could sell it, but ever since the XP-38 came out, they just aren't in demand. Sweet ride tho, Brian! Hang on to that gem!

Saturday, March 29, 2008

ADVENTURES OF MUTT JONES

Man, I'm getting REAL worried they are setting up Shia to be the next Indy in a new trilogy/saga.....

Friday, March 28, 2008

STAR WARS FIGURES PRINT

Check out this 20"x24" poster of all the vintage Star Wars figures - Neat! It's a limited edition print (100) and can be yours for frickin' $80. While you do want it, you also don't want to shell out 80-bucks. I sense much conflict within you. Here's where to order.

FAN ART FRIDAY

THOR STATUE, I SAY THEE YAY ! !

By Odin's Beard! Check out this awesome THOR statue from SideShow! It's $324 and my birthday is in June. Click HERE to order it, and see more pics.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

RANDOM FIND: BACHINATOR

ROBO-SARGE

Click HERE for more!

DVD REVIEW: BEOWULF

I finally got around to watch BEOWULF. Unfortunately, I missed the 3D experience while it was in theaters. Many have told me seeing it in the theater, in 3D, was absolutely amazing. So before I spew out a my review, I am acknowledging that the movie was apparently awesome in 3D.

Beowulf is the oldest epic poem of the Western Civilization. This movie adaptation was co-written by Neil "Sandman" Gaiman, so I had high hopes for a good story. So it amazed me that the story was so weak on so many levels. Instead of doing justice to the story of Beowulf, we get cynical storytellers writing their own sad shortcomings onto classic characters. If you're going to adapt it... and name your movie after it... then you better do it right. This movie should have been retitled with a small disclaimer "Inspired by the Epic Poem "Beowulf". The story is twisted into essentially a weak story of Angelina Jolie sleeping with Kings, and a "hero" who is a liar and a fake. They took a classic tale of heroes, honor and good-vs-evil, and twisted into a trite, cliche tale of late night sex and seduction.

Writers Gaiman & Avery with director Robert Zemekis try to "put a modern, original spin" on the story where the HUMANS are the real monsters and the monster are actually innocent outcasts who deserve our sympathy. If Zemekis wanted to tell that tale, then he should have adapted John Gardner's novel "GRENDEL" in which he tells the tale of Beowulf throught the eyes of Grendel. Its a great book that is vastly more superior and successful than Zemekis' forgettable flop.

They also took two of the oldest, greatest monsters in Western literature and twisted them into boring, unimaginative characters. Instead of a magnificant visual creature worthy of its namesake, Grendel is Crispin Glover playing George McFly's more pathetic, deformed brother with a speech impediment, fond of poetic drama. He felt like the Son of Pumpkinhead throwing a temper tantrum with a screen presense that induced cringing and laughter. And Grendel's Mother simply becomes a naked Angelina Jolie having sex with Kings throughout the ages. I kept wishing I could have plucked the Alien Resurrection Newborn and AVP-R Predalien out of the Alien mythos and shove them into Beowulf. Both series would benefit.

The rest of the cast are stiff, soul-less motion-captured people that annoyed & bored instead of entertained. I got more emotional range from the Team America marionettes. There was no need to make this an animated feature. Live-action would have improved the film immensely....improved, but not enough to salvage.

Not only was this an absolute waste of my time, but after thinking about it a few days, I've come to the conclusion that I truly hate this film... not only for the above review, but for every other reason one can come up with when critiquing a film.

Grade: F

Beowulf vs Predalien & Newborn - an improvement!

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

RIP HERB PETERSON

Herb Peterson, the inventor of the EGG McMUFFIN, passed away yesteday at the age of 89.

So this week, treat yourself to a good ole fashion greasy American junk food breakfast sandwich, and get an Egg McMuffin for Herb!

BATMAN B&W CUSTOM: STANISLAV KLABIK

Semi-related to my previous Batman Black & White statue posts, here's a cool custom... in 3D!

Czech 3D Modeler Stanislav Klabik writes:
"Hi, Batman is my latest personal work, the goal was to make head only, but i decided to make whole body. My last character was totally antihero named Lobo, so now I decided to make true hero:). I´ve tried to do some different model presentation with simple scene, so here is his statue as a 3d print of my sculpt, but without the cloak, because cloak will cover whole back and shoulders and this is mainly model presentation so here is my sorry to all Batman fans here:) Base meshes done in 3dsmax, sculpting in Mudbox, render done in Vray, the books and the furniture in background are evermotion." (source)-------------------------
*thanks, Andrew!

UZIFIED SNAKE-EYES (BY DEMAND)

I had several requests via email to give Ray Park Snake-Eyes an UZI.
Ask and you shall recieve.

TEMPLESMITH MOTU

Found this over at Scott's KingFilm. It's the Masters of the Universe Villains by Ben "30 Days of Night" Templesmith.

Scott posts, "I’ll be the one to say it. I just don’t like Ben Templesmith’s artwork. It’s always a struggle to see whatever the heck it is he’s drawn because everything is all muted and bleeds together."

While I agree with everything Scott said, I also can't help but dig the pic. Maybe its because I have a soft spot for ole Trap Jaw. That must be it. The pic looks like its in progress (which it isn't)... I think I'd like Templesmith's work more if he added some additional love to his pieces.

LEGO DUNE

"Usil has summoned a big one. Once again, it is the legend."
(more pics)
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*thanks for the quote, Mr Legs!

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

TRON



--------------------------------
*thanks, Maker!

PREVIOUSLY. . .

Mike Allred is awesome on so my levels. I recommend picking up some of his MADMAN comics! Speaking of Madman, in his latest series, he has a kickass "Previously In Madman" page... its the first page, behind the cover. There isn't any wordy explanation on what happened in the previous issue... instead, he reprints the entire issue's artwork, crammed onto a single page! I love it! I can glance over real quick and jog my memory, and if I hadn't read that issue yet, its a nice preview which makes me want to hunt down that back issue. Plus its sick to see all of Allred's artwork like that! I wish Marvel & DC would adopt this "Previously In" page in their comics.

Maybe JimSmash could implement a similar feature!

Monday, March 24, 2008

THINKING TOO MUCH ABOUT SNAKE-EYES' PANTS

Fanboys are never happy. They bitch and moan and nitpick stuff to death! While one fan may be pleased, there is surely always another fanboy that is raging. It's really quite annoying.

So the other day I was talking about the SNAKE-EYES movie costume (got some flack for my 7 rating, too!) and I was thinking about those darn commando pants. Then it dawned on me that the FIRST Snake-Eyes figure (pre-Ninja) wore "baggy" military pants! So check it out.....
The RAY PARK Snake-Eyes is a combination of the first two Snake-Eyes! From the waist up is VERSION 2 (albeit the 2001 version 2 version), and the waist down is VERSION 1. A nice amalgam to appease all Snake-Eyes fans, me thinks!

"But Jim, what about the fans who prefer Snake-Eyes version 3-33?"

"Well, those fans are stupid-heads. And more importantly, wrong. Thereby they do not matter, silly." (seriously, v3-up are pretty lame)
------

Here's a pic to further visually demonstrate the amalgamnessisness!
[Snake-Eyes Version-01 pants with Version-02 top!]

While I personally still prefer the awesome flawlessness of the "Ninja" Snake-Eyes, I'm starting to dig the "Ray Park" version for the movie. But it really comes down to how the costume is lit, shot and used.

WHEN ANIMALS ATTACK.....PREDATORS

Many years ago I attended DragonCon in Atlanta. There, writer Kevin J. Anderson spoke about his then-upcoming PREDATOR comic from Dark Horse where the main Predator fights a Grizzly Bear.

No, seriously, that was the story.... Predator vs Bear. He said he got the idea while camping with his family. But really? A Predator story where it fights a bear? I thought it was a lame idea and left the panel to go pursue other geeky things. It stuck with me all these years, of having a Predator vs Bear story out there... that someone at Dark Horse heard this pitch and approved it! Maybe its just me.

Anyway, someone must have been inspired by that story and have written a new Predator novel. Predator vs SNAKE!

The novel revolves around various "hardcore" hunters from around the world gathering in China to hunt exotic animals. Ok, so the story is about the Predator hunting hunters... but why the lame Predator vs Snake cover? All that does is make me laugh and then walk away angry at the further destruction of a once-great concept. A large snake is hardly a threat to a Predator. The next novel should have a picture of a Predator running around swatting at mosquitoes. (novel info)


I know I smash alot of things to the point of people thinking I'm just white noise... but come one, surely I don't stand alone on this one?!!! Anyone??
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*Note: Just wanted to point out that the Predator Vs Snake cover art uses the Predator armor from AVP..... looks like taken from the moment the Predator... sigh... catches the chestburster in mid-air and snaps it's neck...sigh... and then cocks his head in "That's right! I'm a bad mutherfucker!"attitude.... sigh...

CLASSIC KENNER ALIEN COMMERCIAL

video
Saw this awesome badboy over at AliensCollection!
I still can't believe Kenner made toys for kids based on an R-Rated movie. Remember, this was 1979... the line between ratings were less blurred as they are Today and adults weren't a slack about letting underage viewers watch R-Rated movies. Its no wonder the toys were pulled (due to freaked out angry parents). No complaints, because the 18" Kenner Alien is freaking awesome! (Yes, I have one!)

FREAKY UNTOONED HOMER

By Pixeloo.
Made from various photographs of real people.
He's also made an untooned Mario.

SPIDEY MUNCHIES TINGLING !

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Saturday, March 22, 2008

GIJOE WEEK: GIJOE/MATRIX MENTAL THEATER

The first time I saw MATRIX RELOADED (let down!!), I flipped out during the awesome Freeway Chase. Not only because it was pretty sweet, but because in my mind, the movie suddenly morphed into a GIJOE movie. Yes, this is how my brain operates... its always on Dork Mode.

Anyway, since this is "GIJOE WEEK" on JimSmash, I thought I'd share with you my GIJoe/Matrix mental-theater.

CLIP 1: THE FREEWAY CHASE

THE MAIN CAST:























SNAKE-EYES =
MORPHEUS
STORM SHADOW = MAIN AGENT
---























SCARLETT
= TRINITY
TOMAX & XAMOT = TWINS

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SUPPORTING CAST:







KEY MAKER = SCIENTIST
VARIOUS AGENTS = COBRA SOLDIERS
AGENT 2 = MAJOR BLUDD
NIOBE = LADY JAYE

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THINGS TO OVERLOOK:
* Twins phasing (unless you're ok with Tomax & Xamot being able to do that)
* Agents leaping into new bodies
* other stuff you'll know when you see... just go with it.

SCENE SETUP:
Scarlett & Snake-Eyes have brilliant scientist, kidnapped by Cobra in their quest to build the deadly Weather Dominator!!! Tomax & Xamot are in fast pursuit, with the aid of Cobra Soldiers and Major Bludd. Lady Jaye is quickly on the way to give support... but will she make it there in time?!

ENJOY THE SHOW!!



---------------------------------

CLIP 2: THE CHATEAU FIGHT
THE MAIN CAST:
NEO = SNAKE-EYES
BADDIES = COBRA SOLDIERS or CRIMSON GUARD.....
...or....

NEO = STORM SHADOW


ENJOY!


Previous: Top Cobras, Top Joes, Cobra Commander's Kick-Ass Plan, Top Cobra Vehicles, H.I.S.S. Tank Spotlight, Top GIJoe Vehicles, Snake-Eyes 1st Look, Snake-Eyes 2nd Look, Top Moments/Scens From the Comic

Friday, March 21, 2008

CREATE YOUR OWN CYLON

Click HERE for contest info!

HISTORICALLY INNACCURATE MOVIES

From Yahoo, is the
TOP 10 MOST HISTORICALLY INNACCURATE MOVIES

10,000 B.C.
Director Roland Emmerich is usually a stickler for realism (see: sending a computer virus via Macintosh to aliens in Independence Day). So we hate to inform him that woolly mammoths were not, in fact, used to build pyramids. Heck, woolly mammoths weren't even found in the desert. They wouldn't need to be woolly if that were the case. And there weren't any pyramids in Egypt until 2,500 B.C or so. (plus its another Emmerich turd)

Gladiator
Emperor Commodus was not the sniveling sister-obsessed creep portrayed in the movie. A violent alcoholic, sure, but not so whiny. He ruled ably for over a decade rather than ineptly for a couple months. He also didn't kill his father, Marcus Aurelius, who actually died of chickenpox. And instead of being killed in the gladatorial arena, he was murdered in his bathtub.

300
Though this paean to ancient moral codes and modern physical training is based on the real Battle of Thermopylae, the film takes many stylistic liberties. The most obvious one being Persian king Xerxes was not an 8-foot-tall Cirque du Soleil reject. The Spartan council was made up of men over the age of 60, with no one as young as Theron (played by 37-year-old Dominic West). And the warriors of Sparta went into battle wearing bronze armor, not just leather Speedos. (well, its based on the Graphic Novel which was based on the LEGEND, not the historical facts)

The Last Samurai
The Japanese in the late 19th century did hire foreign advisers to modernize their army, but they were mostly French, not American. Ken Watanabe's character was based on the real Saigo Takamori who committed ritual suicide, or "seppuku," in defeat rather than in a volley of Gatling gun fire. Also, it's doubtful that a 40-something alcoholic Civil War vet, even one with great hair, would master the chopsticks much less the samurai sword. (Superior White American Savior yet again!)

Apocalypto
This one movie has given entire Anthropology departments migranes. Sure the Maya did have the odd human sacrifice but not to Kulkulkan, the Sun God, and only high-ranking captives taken in battle were killed. The conquistadors arriving at the end of the film made for unlikely saviors: an estimated 90% of indigenous American population was killed by smallpox from the infected Spanish pigs.

Memoirs of a Geisha
The geisha coming-of-age, called "mizuage," was really more of a makeover, where she changed her hairstyle and clothes. It didn't involve her getting... intimate with a client. In the climatic scene where Sayuri wows Gion patrons with her dancing prowess, her routine - which involves some platforms shoes, fake snow, and a strobe light - seems more like a Studio 54 drag show that anything in pre-war Kyoto. (and 95% of the "Japanese" were CHINESE actors)

Braveheart
Let's forget the fact that kilts weren't worn in Scotland until about 300 years after William Wallace's day and just do some simple math. According to the movie, Wallace's blue-eyed charm at the Battle of Falkirk was so overpowering, he seduced King Edward II's wife, Isabella of France, and the result of their affair was Edward III. But according to the history books, Isabella was three years old at the time of Falkirk, and Edward III was born seven years after Wallace died.

Elizabeth: The Golden Age
In 1585, when the movie takes place, Queen Elizabeth was 52 years old - Cate Blanchett was 36 when she shot the film - and was not being courted by suitors like Ivan the Terrible (who was dead by then). And though the movie has her rallying the troops at Tilbury astride a white steed in full armor with a sword, in fact she rode side saddle, carrying a baton. She was more of a regal majorette than Joan of Arc.

The Patriot
Revolutionary War figure Francis "The Swamp Fox" Marion was the basis for Mel Gibson's character, but he wasn't the forward-thinking family man they show in the flick. He was a slave owner who didn't get married (to his cousin) until after the war was over. Historians also say that he actively persecuted and murdered native Cherokees. Plus, the climatic Battle of Guilford Court House where he vanquishes his British nemesis? In reality, the Americans lost that one. (another Emmerich turd... god this flick was terrible and insulting)

2001: A Space Odyssey
According to this film, in year 2001 we would have had manned voyages to Jupiter, a battle of wits with a sentient computer, and a quantum leap in human evolution. Instead we got the Mir Space Station falling from the sky, Windows XP, and Freddy Got Fingered. Apparently the lesson here is that sometimes it's better when the movies get the facts all wrong. (Ha!)