Hilarious article,
"Talking-Animals Are Ruining My Life",
by Dave White:
"Talking-Animals Are Ruining My Life",
by Dave White:
Dear Hollywood,
Why are you so lame? Why don’t you have a single original idea left in your collective head? Why do you hate audiences? Why do you continue to crank out by-the-numbers animated films that hold ticket-buying families and animation fans in contempt while trying to sell them tie-in merchandise at the same time?
continued...
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* Sorry, Jason. But hey, I've worked on crappy remakes & sequels. It's a Living.
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10 comments:
Bravo Mr. White!
That dude should make movies,
his Ideas rawk!
Wait a minute.. he doesn't have any ideas, he just wants to see something "new". And wants to see this "new" avant-garde in children's animation?
what a toolbox.
Come on..
Does he really think there is a Supreme Coven of Evil Hollywood Animated Film Producers that say.. lets do 12 animated movies this year.. one for each month.. MUHAHAHAHHHAAAHHa?
And saying they should skimp on voice talent is moronic.. Did he do it well? Yes.. but he's famous.. so he doesn't count.. you should give one of my loser dishwashing buddies the gig.. and he'll shine!
Agreed kids don't care about who, but quality acting brings.. quality. So much of animation is animated with the actors performance it's very difficult to seperate the two.
His example of Steve Carell is even more idiotic becasue he was cast before he became "big".
And that brings the final point..
Most of the "good" animation takes 3-5 years per feature.. so his ignorant comment about spend more time on it.. well is just ignorant. I don't know about The Wild, or Doogal, or Barnyard, or America's Hero any of the other crap out this year.. but Pixar, Disney, and Dreamworks all spend several years on each of their features.
This guy sounds like a grumpy middle aged lonely man, who goes to see kids movies to try to "recapture" his youth. And since he doesn't have the "innocence" to just enjoy it for what it is.. he has to climb on to his high horse and make hysterical comparisons of watching a real person die by having their head sawed off, to kids animation..
what a douche.
that doesn't change the fact that most cg movies lately are all talking animals with relatively the same plot.
"Have you seen my childhood?" (blink) (blink) (sobbing uncontrollably)
it's the same for everything that comes along new. It succeeeds, so everyone jumps on board and canibilizes it like a bunch of locusts. Around early 2000, it was all about the "cool, new, grounbreaking special effects" and from then on, EVERY friggin movie was centered around the "money shot". "Hey we can do water really well,...lets make a bunch of movies centered around the ocean",..."Hey, bullet time was awesome,..let's put ti everything."..ect. There are SO MANY movies made just because someone wanted to see something cool, not bc the story was good. I WORK in the visual FX world, and I'm sick of seeing crappy movies made, bc they'll have "Great effects" (how many tims have you heard that about a movie recently???) Do a lot of people put in a lot of hard work,...yes,...was the movie good,..no. So this is the same thing. They will churn these things out as long as they make a profit, until the next cool thing comes along and they can jump on that.
How dare you?!!!
I'm a CG talking animal! I was born that way! I wasn't cooked up by some great writer, wasn't labored over by a team of computer scientists for 3-5 years, and when I open my mouth, Steve Carell's voice doesn't come out!
It's who I am...and I am proud! Yes, I am a bull with a milk filled udder...but I am proud.
Thanks for this open forum to discuss my issues, Jim.
I'm an 2d talking animal..
At least you're getting work..
sigh...
I didn't ask for your opinion flat talking beaver!
Now, go get my dry cleaning! If there is starch on my shirts this time, I WILL ERASE YOU!
Mr. Legs,..your texture map is showing.......there are children present,.please.
Oh dear!
Thank you Maker...
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